Hot chicks who have not stabbed me

Okay, I’m going to be real brief here — some good and bad shit has gone down that has kept me from you guys.  I know a lot of you are wondering what’s up.  Short version, Kristi got out from jail early.  I brought her some white roses when I picked her up, she said she hates the white ones cause they’re plain, and I should KNOW that she likes the red ones best. A fight ensued, hurtful words were said, and that bitch ended up stabbing me in the neck with a pen.  13 hours in the ER and $2100 later, I am back home on bullshit painkillers that haven’t done shit for my pain. Kristi is back in jail cause I pressed full charges on her ass.  I mean, wtf, right?  I love that girl but she’s got some serious growing up to do.  Maybe we’re in different places right now.  I don’t know.  Fuck it.

Dear Friends, my heart almost stopped! I flashed back to Tammy V. dancing around that pole, calling out my name (“Greek, take it Greek! That’s it, baby, show me that fine ass…”). A rush of excitement shimmied its way through my veins and I told the lad, yes, I am the embodiment of Greece itself! He pressed his fleshy hand (and a fifty) into mine and tugged on me, begging me to follow. I was panting, trying to keep up, so enthralled by this new and enticing adventure, its end being a mystery to me.

He pulled me into the women’s bathroom and locked the door behind him. Oh, what a pleasure to be inside this den of iniquity; I had only dared to wonder what kinds of happenings took place behind the sign of the goddess.

I will not bore you with the details of our encounter; suffice it to say, I was schooled in the ways of love yet again, and this feminine creature, this young lusty man, had his way with me. I am certain I will never recover from the profound sense of justice and revenge I feel I have exacted upon the gruff uniformed woman who scorned me, and Tammy V., whose exit I have still not fully understood… but I digress. THIS, Dear Readers, is love at it’s best, raw, hombre a hombre. And all under the roof of my former flame’s dungeon. Sweet Justice, you are my strongest ally and friend.

Enflamed in the name of requited love, Daniel.

When I realized where I was, I reached for my wallet to find that my trousers were missing, and in fact, I had been lying half-nude outside for what may have been hours. Why no one stopped to help a fellow in need is beyond me; when I asked for assistance from a burly man dismounting from his rig, he doubled over in pain, and I heard gurgling sounds emanating from his mouth (he must have been in severe agony but the poor fellow was doing his best to stifle it for my benefit, and the result was something like the sound of choked laughter). A woman in uniform soon approached and offered to help. She was a gruff sort and her uniform was very professional. I guessed her to be a friend of Tammy V.’s by the handcuffs dangling at her waist. I spotted those gleaming tools of delight and sprang an erection so complete I let out a moan. The delightful woman spat at my feet and knocked me to the ground, locking my hands behind me in one fell swoop. I was in love.

She put me in her car, a hulking machine of efficiency; I pondered my fate, excited at the idea that she might take me to her castle and sequester me away in the dungeon below for her future use and degradation. Imagine my surprise when this is exactly what fate had in store for me! I was impressed with the number of men this woman of might had already captured and imprisoned for her pleasure, and looked forward with great anticipation to the moment she would return and use her nightstick to my advantage.

This is all to say, Jad, my association with Tammy V. has reached its natural conclusion. My love has taken on a new form and as I write, I hear her heavy footsteps fast approaching. I have to go. Yours in heavenly exploration and faith in mankind, Daniel.

New pics!

Whoops, you found me! Now what...

Okay, I am fully aware we got a crazy bitch on the loose here on the ‘pad, but believe you me, it is not for long. Please don’t stop coming by. I got a lot more insight and some more guest collaborators lined up so stay tuned. i got high hopes for this place and you’ll be able to say you got in on the ground floor.

(Oh, and the hot chicks are just some eye candy. Guess you could say I have a sweet tooth. Hehe.)

- Jad

Today’s topic (and do forgive me in advance if I repeat this topic on another day, for I do love it so) is How To Find True Love On the Internet. No doubt you’ve read through Jad’s entire blog and duly noted his devotion to Kristi (an aside: Jad, I applaud you, my brother, for staying away from the Tammy V.’s of the world. She would make nothing but trouble for you and your obviously true love [I, however, am very interested in Tammy, both sexually and possibly as a subject for my next in-depth study on promiscuity and venereal diseases, so Tammy, if you're reading this, please give Jad permission for me to knock upon the door of your Pandora's trailer], who as of this moment is sadly counting down the days until she sees you again), the siren of his soul. But did you know, Dear Readers, that Jad and Kristi met on the internet?

Yes, it’s true, a social networking site that shall remain unnamed for obvious reasons (we wouldn’t want everyone rushing there at the same moment, causing the servers of this Great Institution to crash under the weight of crushing desire for love and commitment) was the inspiration for Love with a capital L.

Let me set the scene: A young man goes online looking for an old friend from his youthful days. He sees that this friend has a photo of a beautiful woman on his page, and this sparks a conversation that ultimately leads to a union of hearts and minds, Jad and the goddess Kristi (I am abbreviating and paraphrasing here to save the happy couple embarrassment over the details of their union and the consequent consummation of their marriage of souls). You may ask, “What has this to do with me?” to which I say, “Everything, Dear Reader, Everything.”

What Jad has done here is admirable: he set his sights on the object of his desire and YES, friends, he went for it! Jad is a gentleman’s gentleman, and perhaps out of empathy for those of us huddling in the loveless masses, he has not shared these details with you, Gentle Reader; but, as it is a part of today’s main lesson, I feel it is appropriate for you to have the details so you may further understand the exchanges between Love and Lover that you witness on this blog.

Last but surely not least, in case you have not caught onto the main theme here, it is this: Cast Yourself at That Which You Want and It Will Make Itself Yours. Open your hearts and fulfillment will come flooding in. Peace.